Monthly Archives: September 2012

Get over it. I have to. I will.

It’s funny how “stuff” work it’s way up and down in my life. I’m sure this probably holds true for many other people as well. It has too…


one minutes you’re on cloud 9 then BAM


and it sucks being there.

A year ago I was making payments on a nice 2nd owner car. I had the man. Money was nothing, I dropped $100+ on drugs daily. I had it all.

Well, I made a decision and gave the drugs up. It was hell. But I did it. I was now barely hanging on to the relationship my drug abuse had destroyed.

I relapsed and there was no looking back.

It’s a vicious cycle, our lives can change in an instant.


So the moral of the story?

I think that we need to appreciate what we do have. Sobriety (and relapse) along with being so broke you have to consider eating a cactus, has humbled me.

Remember that we can control the way we feel.

I realized that finally.

If we want it bad enough we will go for it. We control what happens.

So I let go and just went with the flow.

And guess what? I got what I wanted.

It does work.

I will master this… I’m more determined than ever.

I finally asked myself “Why keep fighting?” Id he won;t fight with me, why would I cotinue to give it my all? Oh, but a broken heart does hurt.

—- one of the hardest years of my twenty seven years on this rock spinning around the sun (and no users manual).

originally posted on my other blog (


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No Fear – Serenity… Now

It creates the feeling of seperateness – the false sense of isolation that exists only in your imagination.

Fear is the mind killer (dune frank herbert quote fear dauntless)

We are one. We are connected, interdependent parts of the whole. We are not separate from each other except in the mind, in our false understanding of reality. As we come to understand our contentedness, our need for one another to complete the whole creation, our fears will die.

quotes about life

Nonresistance means surrendering the ego absolutely.

The ego = partially disguised as FALSE PRIDE.

Giving up our ego releases an energy that heals the situation – that smooths the negative vibrations in our path.

Peace comes to us.

We will find serenity each time we willingly humble ourselves.

serenity now - seinfeld

 (from personal notes 1/22/12)
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No Fear

Ralf Weiser's Blog - Shake Up Your Snow Globe! ©

Little pirates engaging in “entering” the other ship (Photo credit: Ralf Weiser).

The most often overlooked thing is that there is a tipping point just before you become courageous. Prior to that point you are not committed to do anything yet. This stage is very unsettling and does not feel good at all. Question is if and when you will make the decision to do move forward and fully engage.

No wonder that this time frame of uncertainty feels uncomfortable. Courage is the ability to confront pain, intimidation, fear, uncertainty, danger, etc. In most cases you risk your health, reputation, status, or economic well-being. They are all not pleasant things when they go wrong.

The only good part is that our brain has a special part that provides self-protection in such situations. This has often been called “lizard” brain. It tries protecting us from harm when we are threatened; it…

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